I was raised in a kampung, where 99.9% of the population are Malays. There was only one Chinese family selling grocery in the kampung known as ‘Cina Awang’. We call him Awang. I think he’s the only Chinese guy in the kampung lah.
My aunty married to a Chinese man. He remains his surname, Chan in his Islam name. Howeever, my uncle doesn’t look like a Chinese at all, except his small eyes and fair skin. But I seldom met him because they stays far from my kampung.
In my kampung, we are a bit sensitive about color. I guess because we never exposed to any other color than Malay’s skin. Even my teacher ever said “What’s good about other races? They are not good at all”.
It doesn’t mean that we are a group of racists, no. But the fact that we never met other races, led our mindset halt a bit and easily become bias.
And you’ll find very small numbers of Chinese, Indian or other races walking in our capital town.
The first time I left my kampung, to be exact, my beautiful state for my tertiary education in UTP, Perak, I was stunned by lots of Indians at Medan Kidd. I still remember how I was so scare to go to Ipoh, even with my friends, because of those Indians, and dogs. I never talked to any Indian, except my mother’s boss who is a very good doctor. I was so afraid and felt so alien among those new colors.
And I met lots of Chinese in Ipoh. Not only that, in UTP I even met Ibanese, Kadazan, even foreigner like Africans, Turkmens, and others.
Believe me I never talked to them because I felt so different.
Until we were parted into smaller groups,a dn in my class we had MCI – Malay Chinese Indian. I started to mingle around. But I was still hesitate, remember that we have label on each other, Malay – lazy, Chinese – smart but so stingy, Indian – stubborn —> just from what I was exposed to. The bad first impression was really bad. I had no confident to talk to my Chinese and Indian friends.
But I was very wrong, when I started to befriend with my classmates, they are not as what I thought. They were just like me, it just the label in my mind made we different. From that point, I made many new friends, from different races. And it was so obvious when I was in Miri. Everybody was just the same. I never feel like an alien anymore.
And I was so surprise when I could get along with those guys like Chen, Loh, Weng Hong, Penny, Swee Ling, David, Kat, Ann, Ho, Anand, Kumar, Bala.. (just to name a few). We even share secrets like my childhood friends did. And I learned a lot from them. Of course la they won’t come and offer, we la have to be proactive.
That’s my story.
For my children, I want them to be ‘color blind’ and can get along with others, despite their races. It is important to me to get rid of the mindset that ‘Chinese group, Malay group, Indian group…’ in my children, as I want them to be highly competitive and dare to face any challenge and stop the so called ‘typical Malay’ attitude that always like to give excuse than producing result.
Why it is important to have color blinded children?
- Bias toward other races sometimes hindering us from taking any positive points from that race. Just like if you’re emotionally (not technically) has a bad feeling towards Fahrin Ahmad, everything about Fahrin Ahmad is bad in your eyes. Even when he goes to masjid you’ll say “Alah, nak tunjuk baik ler tu”. Same goes to this case. Emotionally bias always lead us to the dark side of another persons.
- They’ll forever be like a frog under the glass. They can see everything but they never feel. Just like, the can see that other races are building their wealth, but they can’t get the feeling of building their own wealth by learning from others.
- They won’t have their mindset change, and just keep circling around their wheel. Experience, is not about how long you live, but how far you walk and how much you see. But if you just walk at the same place for the whole life, your so called experience is expected la kan.
- It is encouraged by Islam to get to know other races and nation, as stated in al-Quran that Allah creates human in different nations and races, so that we could get to know each other. So, befriend with other races and nation is also to comply with the Islamic recommendation.
- Others might have resources that we don’t have. Just like Abiy’s friend (a Chinese guy) who has at least 10 properties at premium locations in KL. Who’s the Malay friend of his has such that he could learn from (if he wants tol lah)? Azizi Ali? Obviously not for free. And Mr. Azizi is not his friend summore.. 😀
- To live the spirit of 1Malaysia 🙂
I feel so lucky used to be in Miri. There we met people from various background. Not only MCI but also Dayak, Iban, Penan, Kadazan, Melanau, ….. so many groups of Sarawakian those I couldn’t recall 😀 And the lucky number 2 is that we are staying in KL and working with a multinational company.
Our children has chances to meet people from all over the world, without have to go abroad. We wished to send them to kindergarten where expatriates send their kids. Unfortunately such nurseries are so expensive, and even one we have here couldn’t cope with our schedule.
Now I feel so lucky and happy. I made some Chinese and Indian (and others too, just to mention a few) friends from this blog. And I keep in touch with my other friends too.
My non-Malay readers, do you have anything to say? 😉
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