I was talking to some friends about issues regarding friends, friendship, families and money.
Among the ‘topics’ we discussed was about ‘imagining your yet-to-work younger brother/sister broke something that was so important to you and it costs about Rm200. What would you do then?’
From the discussion, I would say that most of my female friends are really-really generous and family-type persons. Most of them were willing to forgive the younger bro/sis and forget about it because he/she was not working and had no money. And what most important was ‘what’s more important than my own siblings?’.
I was kinda against the idea.
I would as my bro/sis to pay the RM200 for the thing he/she put in damage.
Some people might think that I am so mean, dua ratus pun nak berkira. After all it’s adik sendiri.
Unfortunately, it’s not about the money. I know my bro/sis has no money, but when giving the condition that he/she has to pay me back, I am actually teaching him/her how to fish.
- Never assume people will easily forgive and forget you.
- Be responsible on anything you have done.
- Respect other people’s belonging.
I don’t really mind if he/she can’t pay me back, but please be it just because they’re really don’t have money, after several attempts to collect some. At least I know that they’re really responsible and they show their respect toward me. Reasons, it’s happen, even in my nearest family:
- Faizal Tahir ‘borrow’ money from his Abg Long Farid Kamil (bukan nama sebenar) then forget about it. When Farid Kamil asked, say “Later, later…”.
- Fahrin Ahmad borrowed RM180k from Farid Kamil and told him to pay back in 2 years time. Farid Kamil gave for their brotherhood. But in that 2 years, he never showed any ‘sign’ of chasing money to pay Farid Kamil. Then in the 3rd, 4th and yada2 year, he never talked about the money again. When Farid Kamil asked, he said “Ala Abang Long ni, saya pinjam dengan Abang Long, bukan denganAlong. Kita adik beradik janganla berkira sangat”.
- Farid Kamil gave some amount of money to his brother Fahrin Ahmad (not the one in the prev story) & Faizal Tahir to start a business. The best part was, the business doesn’t even started but the money gone. But, Fahrin Ahmad & Faizal Tahir never bother because it wasn’t their money.
- Farid Kamil owned a business selling bundle T-Shirt. To save cost, he hires Fahrin Ahmad to help him, however Fahrin Ahmad always comes late, return early. Doesn’t take care of customer, etc. When Farid Kamil gives advice, he gets mad and sulky. Then doesn’t want to work anymore.
As the eldest in the family, it is my role to ensure all my siblings able to fish by themselves, rather than come to me and ask for fish. Today maybe we don’t see it much, maybe because I don’t have that lots of money, and my siblings are still studying. But, think about future… if in my fate stated that I’ll become a millionaire (Bibik pun millionaire dah OK!). That time for sure everything won’t be as ideal as we imagine I tell you. Money is a thing that has power to change anyone. Not only to whom has the money but also the people around. If you’re suddenly become a new Donald Trump, don’t you think somebody out of nowhere comes and mengaku sedara? And for your siblings who are very amatur fishermen, takkan taknak tumpang sekaki?
Again, it’s not about the money. But the manner and attitude of ‘being independent’. Pendita Zaa’ba in his book ‘Perangai Bergantung Kepada Diri Sendiri’ stated that our people are lacking in this value. For instance, we are too dependent on subsidy, quota, hak keistimewaan, etc. rather than multiplying our effort to improve our life. Imagine if one day all those thing are no more relevant and demolished. What will happen to us then?
Hopefully all my bothers and sisters know how to catch fish by themselves.
My only sister.
Leave a Reply